Who...Who Is This Guy?

So I'm minding my own business...wasting my own time on Facebook when I catch a glimpse of how many people I am friends with.  Over 300.  I don't have 300 friends!  What?!  That can't be right. Lo and forsooth, it most certainly is.  I'll just have to unfriend some people.  Well now, that's so much easier said than done.  I just kept scrolling through and  finding myself more indecisive than when I'm at the Milton Bakery.

Back at the Rabbit Trail:  The Milton Bakery is a magical land full of sugary, floury goodness and light.  I'm pretty sure that God has blessed these folks with unnatural baking awesomeness.  Pretty darn sure.

I had to make myself some guidelines because I was feeling so mean and hateful.  The word "unfriend" is so...unfriendly.  May these help you out as well if you find yourself in need of them.

1)  If I recognize the face, but not the name or how I ever met the person  to begin with, out ya go.
2)  If you are my friend's husband.  Here's the deal, if you are the spouse of my friend, I am cordial to you in person, but I don't talk to you on Facebook.  I'm chatting with my friend not you.  Why did I friend you in the first place?  Probably because I didn't want to seem unfriendly to you thus making my friend miffy at me.
3)  If I knew you in high school or college, but now we never chat, call, or really even visit each other's pages, yeah...I wish you well, old friend.  If we, neither of us, feel the urge to even put in the effort of "liking" each other's statuses, the clue phone is a-ringing.
4)  If I know you now, but we our conversations are more accidental then intentional and then, not of much substance, it's not that I don't like you, but we're not really friends.  We are barely aquaintances.  We might not NOT like each other, but we obviously don't want to invest any effort into the friendship.  So...yeah.
5)  All family stays.  We might be distant cousins, but family is family and unless you hurt me, my kids or my husband, you stay.  We might irritate each other, but God has ordained it to be.  So, you're stuck with me like those expensive boots you bought that you never wear because they hurt so much but they cost too much to throw out.  Family is stronger then painful footwear.

So if you caught this on Facebook, well guess you made it through and now you and Balki Bartokomous can do the dance of joy!  Honestly, I don't think the people who've been Un-Friended will even notice, and if they do, not for awhile.  I don't even think they'll care.  I guess we'll see.  And now, back to the real world.

Back at the Rabbit Trail:  If you don't know who Balki Bartokomous is, Goggle it, Youngin'! Geez!  Balki rocks.