For What Could Have Been

Today, most vile evil came upon some poor little angel babies.  They couldn't even defend themselves.  They must've been so scared.  It's so futile, I know, but I wish I could've done something to help them.  It doesn't matter that it's not possible.  I still wish it.  Parents shouldn't have to bury their children, and children shouldn't be afraid of school.  It's simply vile and wrong and evil.

My fear is that this horror will be used only to promote the kind of gun control that will turn honest and good men into criminals and make illegal gun runners very rich.  That's also wrong.  If one is bent on committing evil, one will do it on either side of the law.

I'm finding it hard to sleep.  I weep for those angel babies.  I didn't know them, and in all probability, I never would.  Still, I weep for what could have been. The doctors, lawyers, plumbers, artists, humanitarians, explorers, comedians, firefighters that were lost to evil on this day.  The great things they might have done.  The great parents they might have made.  The better world we might have lived in...all stolen from us...

Lord Jesus, bring comfort to these shattered heart and lives; protect us from such evil; heal the poor demented minds that would do such things; show us Your light on this very dark day....

Time for Personal Growth...Are You Kidding Me?

NO!  No I'm not!

Yeah, see, here's the thing about growing as a person:  you have to do things you never wanted to do...as in ever.  Why do you have to do them?  Because Life demands it.  That's right.  The great, all powerful force known as Life demands that you now perform an act of Are-You-Kidding-Me? by throwing you into circumstances that you cannot avoid.

Things like, your car breaking down 45 minutes from your house as you travel home from a rather fun Thanksgiving with family.  Now, what's really great is you've had coffee.  It was so good.  Now, it's bitterness makes itself known as you are stranded miles from a bathroom, and you, by no means, are an outdoorsy kinda girl.  You are the kind of girl who camps at the Holiday Inn.  Life giggles and taps its fingertips together in anticipation.  The show is about to start.  More giggling.  Because sometimes Life is a total butt munch.

Okay, so there I am.  In pain.  Waiting for the tow truck guy.  My MIL, who is officially our knight in shining armor and shall henceforth be known as Lady Momsalot, has come to pick us up because the munchies are cold and getting very bored.  The woods by the car are so thick, you have to hike up into them with a sherpa.  I can barely stand.  Time to get creative...and humble...and horrified...and scarred for life...and grow as a person.

I open the front door (and no, the light WILL. NOT. TURN. OFF.) and the back door, drape a blanket between them and balance.  For a split second, I could almost pretend I was in a public restroom.  (It was shockingly similar actually..when you think about it..whoa...)  Almost...until the blanket fell.  Nope.  On the side of the road.  Peeing while praying truckers don't notice the full moon as they pass on by.  Personal. Growth.

 I don't think I had ever felt like kicking Life in the groin until that moment, but in that moment, I sure did.  And those are the Are-You-Kidding-Me? moments when you have to be a grown-up and do what has to be done even though you really don't want to.  If you don't, Life just points and laughs like the butt munch lint licker it likes to be sometimes.  Doing what you gotta do is the kidney shot that wipes the smug smile off Life's face.  While Life is in pain, trying to breathe, you say, "Boo-yah Life!  Peeing on the side of the road...like a boss!  Yeah!  In. Your. Butt Munch. FACE!"  That's when you kick Life, so it knows you mean it!  You do it with flair too, but you have grown as a person.  That's right.  Personal growth.  It's gonna happen so be ready.
..still horrifying though...just sayin'...