It's Late, I'm Gonna Throw You a Bone

Okay people. Rule of thumb: think about what you're going to say before you say it. I'm just saying it's a good idea. I keep running into people who seem to have forgotten that just because you think it, doesn't mean you have to say it. You are ALLOWED to keep certain thoughts to yourself. True story. Let me give you some for instances.

If you meet someone who of an ambiguous origin, don't just throw one out there. Don't just make one up. If you can't tell if their ancestors came from Egypt or Mexico, um, ask them. People are not offended at most questions. They are offended at most assumptions.

Conversely, if you are of an obviously of a certain background, don't automatically assume every question has to do with your background. If someone asks you if you like beer more than whiskey, don't just assume they're making a reference to your being Irish and that all Irish people are big drinkers especially if the the question is in relation to the current conversation. They could be just asking because they brew beer as a hobby. I had a suite mate in college who had a friend that made everything I said into some negative reference to them being black. "You just said that cuz I'm black, didn't you?" "No, I was just saying your shoe is untied." True story.

Now, I have been fortunate enough to be an Army Brat, and as such, I have traveled the world and have experienced many cultures. Many people have no such luck. It's hard for fish in a small pond to understand the ways of the Great Barrier Reef. Please take all questions that end with "why do you people do that?" with a measure of grace. It's not usually a sign of malice towards you. Again, conversely, if you really can't believe that some Asian cultures eat dogs, please ask what ever that question in you mind is to yourself. Will it bring you closer to that person or push them away? Are you really wanting to know more about this practice of eating dogs or are you passively aggressively letting this person know that their people are horrible, disgusting dog eaters while trying to sound culture saavy? Seriously, think about it.

Quit asking people when they are getting married/having a baby/going back to school/blah blah blah. If you can't think of anything else less personal or less none of your business, talk about the weather. Especially the baby thing. Honestly. It's like asking people about how much sex they're going to have...seriously! Mind your own!

Also quit asking fat people or really skinny people about their eating habits. It's insulting! Stop it! Not every fat person lives on Coke and donuts. Not every skinny person has an eating disorder. Maybe they have a sickness that makes them gain weight or not able to gain weight. You don't know. Mind your own! Honestly!

And finally, people are going to say dumb stuff to you. They just are because everyone does stupid stuff sometimes. Just look at the fruit. Are really trying to be nasty or are they just uneducated about the subject at hand? Once again, think before you speak. If you're afraid you might have verbal diarrhea, just go home and google and/or Wikapedia that thing you just must know. Then, you appear wise for saying nothing as opposed to an idiot who can't stop talking. And it's 2 am. Jen's out. Peace!